Showing posts with label Ask Charlotte. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Ask Charlotte. Show all posts

2/10/10

Ask Charlotte

I am keenly interested in the questions typed into google that bring readers to my blog. If I have answers, I'm happy to share my knowledge, and so "Ask Charlotte" was born.

Today's burning question: "Is Charlotte the smartest girl in the world?"

Answer: Sadly, no. Charlotte, although plenty smart, is only ranked fourth at Number Mix, one of the games Harper Collins is using to promote its new books. If Charlotte were really smart, she might well have been doing other things with her time anyway......

Today's queries also include one from a reader wondering when the new American Girl book by Laurence Yep (!!!) was coming out. I cannot answer this.

9/30/09

Ask Charlotte

Welcome to this week's edition of Ask Charlotte, in which I answer the questions typed into search engines by the masses of desperate people seeking help, and finding my blog instead.

This week's questioner appears to be a would-be author, looking for inspiration, a cool plot that hasn't been taken, or possibly just searching for a void in the literary world that needs filling.

He or she is looking for "books to write." Google gives you 17,700,000 hits on this, but there is no specific list available.

From perusing my stats, I know of two books that lots of people would like to see written: "why didn't make ricky ricotta neptune"? and while we're at it, why didn't ricky ricotta pluto, either?

If anyone does, in fact, know if these last two Ricky Ricotta books ever will be written, over a thousand people have tried to find out by reading my blog, and we'd all appreciate an answer...

9/23/09

Ask Charlotte

Last week I started a new feature, one that demonstrates just how Caring I truly am. I derive great pleasure from reading the search terms that lead people here, and felt that I should try to answer the burning questions of those who seek me out. Some I will never answer (What happens in the first chapter of Roland Smith's Peak? What are the main themes of Peak? Where can I find a book report for Peak online? Just read the book, for crying out loud). But some of the questioners have more interesting problems, and are people that I feel I can Help.

Like this poor person, caught in a Kafka-esque nightmare, seemingly unable to confide in family or friends, and finally turning, in desperation, to the internet, with this pitiful cry for help:

"Am I a bunny?"


Answer: No.

Not even if your name is Nicholas and you live in a hollow tree.

9/16/09

Ask Charlotte

Many readers of Charlotte’s Library come here looking for advice, and I often feel that I should answer their questions for them. Some are sad: “How do you say sorry when a friend’s sister dies?” And some are silly. Knowing they probably won’t come back to read the answers, though, has kept me from spending any effort on this.

Until now.

Today I was asked:

“How to hook up with a random girl at school library.”

It seems easy enough—you go up to her when she is reading and say “What are you reading?” Or ask her for advice--"Do you know any good books about x y or z?" That sort of thing. Or sit next to her reading a funny book, and start laughing--maybe she'll ask what's so funny.

But my questioner has a more subtle problem—the need for randomness. How can you truly know if the girl you see in the corner is a random girl?

My suggestion here is to map the library on graph paper ala Dungeons and Dragons, number each square, and start rolling your twelve sided dice…until you get a square that has a girl in it. A girl who comes over to ask what you are doing would, de facto, not be random.

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